He’s never taken me or our kids with him. When I asked him why, he told me that his mother doesn’t want to see any “in-laws” on that trip and that he doesn’t want to take care of the kids on his own. This year, a week before he was supposed to leave, I couldn’t take it anymore and called my mother-in-law.
“Why don’t you allow Tom to take us along on vacation? Don’t you consider us family?” I asked.
“WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, DEAR?” she replied, sounding surprised
There was a moment of silence on the line as her words sank in. “The annual family trip to the islands?” I clarified. “Tom says you don’t want any in-laws on the trip, and that’s why he never brings me or the kids.”
My mother-in-law was silent for a moment before she finally responded, her voice filled with confusion. “Honey, I have no idea what you’re talking about. We haven’t had a family trip to the islands in years, not since the kids were younger. Tom has never mentioned anything about a yearly trip.”
A chill ran down my spine as the realization hit me. Tom had lied. For twelve years, he had told me he was going on a family vacation that apparently didn’t even exist.
I took a deep breath, trying to keep my voice steady. “Thank you for clarifying. I’ll talk to Tom.”
The rest of the day was a blur as I waited for him to come home, my mind racing with questions. Where had he really been going every year? And why lie about something like this?
When he finally walked through the door, I confronted him. “I spoke with your mother today,” I said, watching his expression carefully. “She told me there’s no annual family trip to the islands.”
His face went pale, and for a moment, he was speechless. “What… what are you talking about?” he stammered, trying to regain his composure.
“Tom, where have you really been going all these years?” I demanded, feeling a mix of hurt and anger rising in me.
After a long pause, he finally confessed. It turned out that he had been taking solo trips, claiming they were “family vacations” so he wouldn’t have to explain his need for time away. He had rented a cabin or stayed at a resort, wanting a break from the responsibilities of family life.
The betrayal stung deeply. He had not only lied but had left me alone with the kids, year after year, while he enjoyed his own private escapes.
I told him how hurt I was and that our marriage couldn’t survive without honesty and accountability. That night marked the beginning of a series of honest conversations, a time of reckoning for our relationship. Whether or not we’d stay together was uncertain, but one thing was clear: he wouldn’t be taking any more “family vacations” without his actual family.